BI-CURIOUS ME – A REVIEW.

This documentary claims to “meet three women coming to terms with changes in their sexuality and exploring same-sex relationships.”

So, from this, I immediately expect a programme about women entering into lesbian relationships and seeing how they feel about that.

Now, I’ve watched a bit of this before I started reviewing it and I just want to emphasise a key word: relationships. I’ll get back to that later.

The opening scene is a Burlesque event at a London club and the narrator says that “what’s new is that the audience is mostly female”. Is this true? Was it mostly a male audience before?

We then see a close up of a woman who says “Women are exploring themselves a bit more, they’re getting a lot more liberal; people are just wanting to try new things.”

I don’t like the sound of this.

Liberality has very little to do with same-sex relationships. I don’t date women because I’m an open minded person; I date women because I am attracted to women. I’m not just trying new things.

I have a feeling this programme will annoy me.

The narrator then says “Never before has it been so on-trend to have your first lesbian experience.”

I want to stop watching this programme.

A Burlesque dancer then states that she thinks that most women are “naturally bi-curious”. That’s a bold statement to make and, again, I’m not sure if that’s true…

The first couple we meet have been seeing each other on and off for a year. They thought, for many years, that they were straight but then realised that they might not be.

One of the women says that she had fancied women many times before. Right. But you still thought you were straight?

This programme is throwing up frequent inconsistencies and I’m starting to grow more frustrated with it. Remind me why I decided to review this?

It is then revealed that the other half of the pair still has feelings for her (male) ex. Hmmm. She thinks that her life is exciting. I think it’s bloody complicated.

This woman (we’ll call her Danielle. (I think they told us her name but I can’t remember it…)) is going out to a Burlesque evening with some women that she has seen or is seeing. (Sorry, was it just me or did she have a girlfriend?) Apparently her and these “friends” just have a normal friendship but that they’re so intimate and close that it sometimes gets sexual. She says there’s “no jealousy” and “no weirdness”.

Remember that relationship word that I said was quite key? Yeah, that. Yes, they’re in a relationship but it’s not a monogamous one. I know the bisexual and lesbian community is quite small and there are bound to be some overlaps but at the same time? And yes, that’s just how she lives and if she’s happy and the other people around her are happy then brilliant; I’m cool with that. But I thought this programme was going to be different; I didn’t expect this.

The female body is described as “beautiful” and “sexual”. Finally; a deeper rooted look at female sexuality instead of a slightly awkward display of promiscuity.

Then they go to a strip club. Oh.

Next up is a woman who goes up to random women on the street and tells them how “stunning” or “striking” they are. She’s a dating coach making a video, for men, about how she chats up women. There are some fundamental differences there surely?

She thinks that “lots of women are more liminal in their sexuality; they are more bi-curious. I think if you present people with opportunities, you kick a door down, people will become receptive to that”. Is she suggesting that she can awake bisexuality in people just by giving them the chance to talk to her?

Her work, she states, often blurs with her sex life and she’s ended up sleeping with people she’s met on the street.

This woman seems fearless! She’s chasing after women in the street and telling them that they’re hot! Whilst I admire her bravery I can’t help but think that if I did that where I lived I’d get punched…

Whilst in a monogamous relationship she says that she’s committed but, whilst single, she will seek people out. Again, I’m cool with that. But isn’t this programme meant to be about relationships?

Jill is the next woman we meet. She’s returning home after three weeks away to an empty house because her husband is away.

Her husband, Andrew, describes meeting her, marrying her and their married life. After 22 years of marriage, Jill had an affair; with a woman.

Back to Danielle now who is in Amsterdam talking about sex. She’s very confident and that puts me off her, it goes beyond a bit of flirty boasting and goes into full on cockiness.

An interview with her parents say that as long as she is happy they’re happy. This is nice, another grounded moment in a slightly skittish documentary.

We then hear Sophie’s story and how she’s hiding elements of her life. She says that her parents wouldn’t be happy about it and that she thinks that people have a distorted view of bisexuality.

This is what I was expecting from the documentary; an honest, raw portrayal of the lives of women who like women and the problems they face.

Jill says that her discovery that she liked women was gradual and over a long period of time.

Danielle (whose real name is Hayley) meets up with her ex and reflects on what could have been and what might be. It’s not long before she’s flirting with another woman and I can’t help but think that maybe her confidence is covering something up?

After a trip to Miami and seeing Jill on a boat, the programme ends. Thank goodness.

I’ll say this; it wasn’t for me. I think bad marketing of the documentary let it down and that it was not what its target audience was expecting. Maybe I’m being a bit too critical but I didn’t enjoy it. It had moments that were genuine and good to see but it was over shadowed by stereotypes. Not particularly enjoyable.

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4 thoughts on “BI-CURIOUS ME – A REVIEW.

  1. elletueff says:

    It’s gotten to the point for me, personally, that I will no longer associate myself with the orientation “bisexual”. Not because I’m not attracted to both men and women, but because the word’s been hijacked and made into a kind of corny cliche by programs, pop music, etc. It’s associated with sluttiness, confusion and novelty sex acts. I’m also not just simply attracted to men and women, but men who look like women and women who look like men. I wouldn’t have been able to handle watching the show in its entirety. You’re braver than I am.

    • waggcomedy says:

      I admire you so much for this! I can completely understand why you’ve chosen not to go by “bisexual”. I think, in recent years, the word has lost its core meaning and it used so flippantly! Haha, it was hard!

  2. ReaderX says:

    Sorry to hear you each found it somehow threatening. I found it refreshing to see television even dared to tackle the subject at all. I had no preconceived notion that the women would be somehow just like me. They were themselves. And their stories were interesting. I’m glad the programme shared a glimpse of non-normative sexuality.

    • waggcomedy says:

      I’m glad it showed bisexual people! I’m all in favour of that, I just found it a little fake almost and I don’t think it showed bisexual people in a great light which is a shame because they’re great people! 😀

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